Monday, 8 April 2013
My Husband Was Feeding From Me; I Now Want A Real Man –– Nollywood actress Moji Olaiya
Moji shares the secrets pains of her marriage with Tribune and finally confirmed that she has separated from her husband for life. No going back! See brief excerpt below:
Do you apply so much dedication to marriage too [like you do to your acting job]?
Oh yes, I do. Marriage is an institution by God and a lifetime affair, so if I dedicate so much passion to my job, how much more my marriage? I am a very good Christian and I respect the marriage institution a lot.
So, in what state is your marriage as we speak, are you still with your husband?
I want to use this medium to say categorically and officially that I am separated for life with my husband. I have never talked about this officially before because I was thinking we could amend and make it work again but I am saying emphatically here that all is forever over between me and my husband. This has been on for two years now but I thank God I have been able to pick my life back and move ahead.
Are you saying the issue is irreconcilable?
Exactly. It is finally over between us, there is no going back.
But what actually happened between you and your husband?
It’s a long story, but I guess the error I made was not taking time to study him before marrying him; I rushed into the marriage because I was in love. Now, I see and know better. But we are separated for life and for good. We only courted for a year and a half and he was always going and coming. It was more of a love across the sea affair.
For how long were you married and how many children do you have for each other?
We were together for four years and there is no child between us. He has two boys already and I have my daughter, so we didn’t have any kid.
Could that be the reason for the issues at home or could it be that he wasn’t comfortable with your job?
It had nothing to do with no kids or my job. He didn’t just understand and wasn’t ready to be a real man that will fend for his wife and home. While the marriage lasted I gave it my all, I ensured I didn’t sleep out on location just to keep my home and my job suffered a bit too but he wasn’t just there for me. While we were together, I was practically the bread winner, he was unnecessarily and unfairly suspicious and listens to rumours about my personality, I doubt if he had real love for me because you don’t doubt whom you love.
He wasn’t hardworking at all and he never appreciated my efforts in keeping the home intact financially such that he even turned brutal, there were issues of domestic abuse. It is a bad thing for a man not to be hardworking and unable to fend for his home. But it is all over now and we have not even communicated in the last two years.
Do you have plan to remarry in future?
Yes, of course but this time to a real man, a God-fearing, hardworking, loving and understanding man who will love me for who I am and love my job too. Someone who is capable of taking care of me and not vice versa. And I will take my time to study him well this time around.
Are you seeing any man now?
Yes of course, but I am not ready to disclose details of him yet.
What is your perception of life?
Life is interesting when you keep a free mind towards others. When you suspect everyone around you, you cage yourself and your feelings and it means you don’t trust yourself too. Whatever situation you find yourself, know that life will go on; it will only stop when you are tired of going on.